Mastering Depression

Clinical depression is a disease - or a dis-ease, it strives to make you 'uneasy.' A powerful metaphor for depression is to consider the disease as a team of engineers, whose primary purpose is to tear down bridges, not build them. The bridges that depression seeks to destroy are those bridges, or pathways in your brain that link the feelings of pleasure to your life experiences with people, place and events. In real life - depression hurts. Before it controls your life completely it is critical you find a way to deal with depression.

A more pathological description of this which illustrates why anti-depression drugs are helpful speaks of the neuro-synaptic pathways (bridges) that are in your brain, and over which these signals travel to connect the cells that retain the memory of our life experiences, to the cells the trigger the endorphins and hormones that we know are the sensation of pleasure. Anti-depression can do two things physiologically - they can stimulate the use of more serotonin (the raw material to build these bridges with) and prevent that raw material from being re-absorbed before it can be used to build the bridge.

These bridges/neuro-synaptic pathways, are built through every experience we have from birth. Like walking in a grassy field, the more you walk the same path, the more the grass lies down, and the clearer and easier the path becomes, until it become second nature.

As you may have experienced, depression tears these bridges down, leaving one dis-engaged, or 'checked-out' from many, and ultimately all, of those experiences that brought you satisfaction or pleasure. For those who allow this core of engineers to tear down these bridges, without enacting a plan to re-build the bridges, and save those bridges yet destroyed. find them selves completely 'checked-out' and reach such despair life may feel as if it has no meaning.

I believe that life is about fully engaging in BOTH love and passion, AND being the conduit of compassion that allows these gifts to flow through us, and to be shared with others. Depression seeks to destroy our meaning of life by breaking these bridges.

Personally I faced the battle of depression back in the 90's when I was burying a friend a week from AIDS, and from my clinical counseling training. I believe a multifaceted approach is the most powerful way to combat depression - a possible combination of drugs, therapy and personal action.

Only a licensed psychiatrist or medical doctor can prescribe anti-depressants. An experienced counselor or therapist is almost always necessary to help you travel this journey - and overcome that insidious corp or bridge destroying engineers!

The personal action is about effecting the plans you create with your counselor or therapist to "kicking the butts" of that insidious corp of engineer and refusing to let bridges to be destroyed, while striving to re-build old ones and create new ones at a rate greater then these nasty guys can destruct them!

Easier said then done, I know, as the loss of these connects leads to apathy, which feeds the destruction. It is quickly a vicious circle that can be created, and only an aggressive plan of action will stop this downward spiral.

Consequently, remaining motivated is not unlike an alcoholic remaining sober. Therapy helps, drugs help, but CRITICAL to success is a personal support system of friends and family who love you so much they will not let you fail. Support groups are great but few things are better then a proven circle of friends and family who love you too much to let you fail, and love you so much, that they can see past your pain, and patiently support you as you re-build these bridges together. Take stock of these relationships. Many may already be strained as depression has already worked its toll. Depression knows these connections are its greatest enemy - desperately seeking to destroy the bridges that you have built with these people. Yet they are the easiest bridges to salvage and re-build as they are the ones that have historically served you well. Your heart knows these relationships can be trusted, even if your brain tried to convince you that you have 'checked-out.'

Curing depression is about creating AND re-creating love and passion in your life. Take a good look around you - who are the sources of the most powerful love you experienced in the past? Who do you know loves you enough that you can trust their judgment over your own as depression seeks to drive you into loneliness and despair? Who loves you enough and who can you trust to walk that journey with you?

Beating depression and living a life of passion and love will only happen in relationship. Those relationship best include your friends, family and loved ones, an experienced counselor or therapist who understands your challenges, and the possible support of a medical practitioner.

Clinical signs of depression may include some or all of the following descriptors. Feelings of hopelessness and helplessness, impaired concentration and difficulty making decisions, fatigue, loss of energy, or being tired all the time, low self-esteem, trouble sleeping or oversleeping the use or escalating use of drugs and/or alcohol, and/or a poor appetite or overeating.

If you believe you are suffering from depression it is critical that you seek professional help. The time to do so is as early in the process as possible. If you are experiencing some or any of the symptoms listed above contact a professional who will be able to help you. As you have learned from this article, the earlier in the process that you can take action to prevent the disassembling of the many bridges of love and support in your life as possible, the more effective and the quicker your treatment will be.

Experiencing a life full of passion and love is a phenomenal experience. To live such a life requires that you decide to be the master of your mind and experiences. Many of us do not intuitively know how to exercise these skills and an experienced counselor or therapist provides an excellent opportunity for you to develop this mastery.

Todd Kaufman provides counselling and therapy in Toronto and via SKYPE. He uses a broad range of therapeutic techniques and approaches unique for each client that are designed to provide powerful, effective and expedient ways to overcome challenges and create the life you desire. Todd's personal experience and clinical training has made him and expert member of treatment teams for depression.

His organization http://www.GenesisSquared.com specializes in relationships and people-centric solutions for businesses and groups.

In additional to personal therapy and counselling GenesisSquared provides corporate and executive coaching, and corporate workshops for executives, managers and front line staff. Workshops are designed manifest positive relationships within the organization and between the client and their customers/patients resulting in decreased attrition, and increased bottom lines.

GenesisSquared also provides Presentation Marketing Training and Public Speaking Workshops for both the beginner and accomplished speakers. GenesisSquared - People-centric Solutions.

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Coping With the Suicide of a Loved One

My father passed away from suicide when I was 14 years old. I was the one to find him. I suffered for many years with depression of my own and also what I felt was the humiliation of having a parent who committed suicide.

Clinging to relationship after relationship and, in the meantime, abandoning friends before they could abandon me, I spent years struggling inwardly while on the surface making it appear that everything was fine. Suppressing my emotions, people pleasing, and a feeling of shame created physical ailments for me such as migraines, high blood pressure, and acne.

Suicide has such a stigma to it in our society that, from my perspective, it would have been a totally different situation if my dad died from a heart attack or cancer. I spent years holding a resentment towards him for his suicide and also the depression and moodiness that I consistently was surrounded by as a child.

I am now in my 30's and no longer feel the animosity or sadness that I felt for years about his suicide. I can't really say that it even bothers me so much anymore and I have very loving feelings towards my dad. What's great is that you don't have to spend 20 years hurting like I did before you begin to heal. The healing process can begin today, in this very moment.

One of the first areas to start with is forgiveness. I wouldn't even call it forgiveness, but something much more powerful, compassion.

When I really looked at the situation and realized just how much pain my dad was in, how he suffered in his childhood, and ultimately could not escape the madness of his mind, I feel a sense of deep love and compassion for him. He was simply doing the best that he could have at the time with what he knew. If he knew better, he would've acted differently.

What he did wasn't personal against me or anyone else. He was in so much pain and felt that there was no other way out. When I came to that awareness, my anger began to fade away, and love and compassion for him took over.

I also stopped seeing myself as a victim and a victim of circumstance. I did this through the letting go of the preconceived notions that I had about myself, the story. I thought for so long that I was my story, that I was my past, that I was my fears, that I was all those things that happened in my life. In fact, those are all just a collection of experiences that make up a life situation.

They aren't really who I am in my true essence, which is something much more divine than anything anyone of us could ever imagine. The more that I accepted myself as a soul, as a spiritual being, and the more that I began to view myself as something grander than any life story, a surrendering took place. A surrendering to what is, to what was, and to what will come, set me free.

I surrendered to all that had happened in my life involving my dad, his depression, and ultimate suicide. For so long, I insisted that it should not have occurred, that things should have been different, and I am a victim because of it. Really? Is that true? Things happened the way that they happened and me trying to change that, or act like it should have been otherwise only causes more suffering for me.

Acceptance of his suicide helped me to discover true freedom. Acceptance doesn't mean that we necessarily condone things, but that we stop telling ourselves that the past should be different than what it was.

I was no longer an ashamed little girl with this victim story. I am a beautiful soul who is on this earth at this time with a purpose. We all are, every single one of us. We have just forgotten this and have gotten a little sidetracked.

When you begin to view yourself and others in this way, compassion for them is much more possible. After my father's death, I made an internal decision to never talk about it as much as I could help it. I eventually did start talking about it, though, about 15 years later.

It has been truly healing for me to see my father in this new, more compassionate light. I feel as though I have a new friend on the other side and all is forgiven. On a deeper level, there is nothing to forgive because we are all doing the best we can with what we know. When I put myself into his shoes, I can honestly say that I understand, and it is okay.

Victoria Ayres is a Certified Life Coach and writer. Her services are available via phone, Skype, and in-person. Visit http://www.VictoriaAyres.com or email her at VictoriaAyres11@gmail.com for more information. Follow her on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/victoriaayres11 and Twitter at #VictoriaAyres11.

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Is It My Fault That I Have Depression?

Until a few years ago, it was often difficult to establish a connection between the mental side of depression and the physical symptoms. Then, along comes Dr. Joseph Griffin of the European Therapy Studies Institute. This brilliant man made a connection between dreams and depression, thereby making the treatment of this disorder far easier.

Now here comes our old friend, rumination. Do you ruminate or brood about things that happened way in the past, or some nebulous future event? As you know, we've covered rumination before, but lt has it must be made quite clear that it achieves nothing whatever.

Did you know that depressed people dream three times more than those who don't have depression? This breakthrough in understanding dreaming, is what makes depression treatment so much easier. The dreaming part works in this way.

Supposing you've borrowed something from your next door neighbour. You know he's a bit mad at your tardiness at returning it. You're a bit nervous about going round to his house, even to return the article, but finally you square your shoulders, pick up whatever it is he may have lent you, and round you go. He's delighted to have the item back again, and you're very pleased that the matter has been put to rest.

But supposing you've been putting it off and off, until it's really worrying you. The concern will be with you all day, and when you go to bed that night, and probably a lot of nights before and after. If you keep worrying about this, or you've been brooding about anything else, then you'll probably have the same dream night after night.

On the other hand, if there's nothing particularly onerous going on in your life, your brain will complete it's work of dreaming and 'repairing' your body. We dream every night, of course, but the chances are you can't remember them when you wake up in the morning. That's a good sign. Under normal circumstances, your mind cleanses your brain of everything that is of no use to you, so that when you wake in the morning, you feel refreshed.

But you ask; 'Is it my fault that I have depression?' No, absolutely not. You dream in metaphor. You may have a dream that comes reasonably close to what you were thinking about when awake. That in itself is fine. It's when you sit there brooding and ruminating that the trouble starts.

The more negative thoughts you pile into your brain, the more you'll dream and the more work the brain has to do. Dreaming occurs during R.E.M sleep, or Rapid Eye Movement. But this isn't the good, deep restful sleep that we all need. So if R.E.M. isn't restful sleep, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to understand that you'll 'wake' in the morning feeling quite exhausted.

Hypnosis and Psychology are such vast subjects, but you'll learn a very great deal by clicking onto http://www.thehypnosisattraction.com Not only that, but you'll find a FREE hypnosis audio tutorial on Mike Bond's site at http://www.thehypnosisattraction.com

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The Overflow of Comfort in Suffering

"For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows."
• 2 CORINTHIANS 1:5

Just how are we to cope with life when we're pushed to end it?

When our struggles all swarm together, aggressively and chaotically, we vacillate between anxiousness and fatigue - back and forth, with no middle ground to be enjoyed. Hope dissipates into the ether. Even our memory for hope is scant. We search for any sign of encouragement that would help. There is none forthcoming. We wonder where God has departed to - when we most need him.

Yet, God is there, alright!

Having felt abandoned, it comes as a shock to understand it was the other way around all along. We abandoned God in our time of need. We chose a direction to go in and we departed from our only help. We sought the vain help of a world desperate and forlorn; a futile hope. Our spiritual eyes were blinded for a time; how unfortunate, just at a time when we could have most benefited from the comfort of God.

Yet, God is still there! - for us, not ever against us.

***

As we draw closer to God in our affliction - in the bemused numbness of our torment - we experience something of God's comfort from a Saviour who knows our pain intimately as his own. He that was crushed for our iniquities, who has borne the pain of a groaning creation, has stooped to experience our pain with us - as we experience it.

In stooping, the Lord has poured divine empathy into our situations for us to redeem as we rest in the lushness of his Presence. What sounds so winsome is a hard reality with a soft landing - the day dawns with hope after a full night of despair.

Christ suffered more so he would have sound basis to know the cosmic totality of suffering; divine credibility is important when we reach out to God in our pain. We are healed because if Christ could forgive stark oppression, so can we.

***

As the sufferings of Christ flow over into each of our lives, so too does the comfort we receive from God overflow when we draw close. Such a comfort is enjoyed by a sweet and serene surrender, accepting the pain for what it is. Such surrender is courageous and true to experience; thus comfort is given and enjoyed.

More joy is available having received the healing that comes from comfort by the hand of God.

© 2013 S. J. Wickham.

Steve Wickham is a Baptist Pastor who holds Degrees in Science, Divinity, and Counselling. Steve writes at: http://epitemnein-epitomic.blogspot.com.au/ and http://tribework.blogspot.com.au/

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5 Spectacular Ways to Beat the Blues

Feeling down in the dump? A nasty case of depression taking over? If yes, then gear up. You need some pep talk and buckets of comfort food to beat the blues. Our fast-moving lives invariably hit a rough patch every once in a while, when a serious bout of lethargy seems to take control for no apparent reason. Your multicoloured world all of a sudden seems bleak, dull and gloomy. Chances are you have pushed your system too hard and now it is in a rebel mode. Rather than wallowing up in the self-inflicted misery, you need to break free from the tandem and take charge of your life. Here are five spectacular ways you can pep yourself up.

Watch Funny Chick Flicks

Put on a funny DVD, retreat to your room, put on your comfy PJs and heat up a huge bowl of buttered popcorn. Nothing is good than a hearty laughter to repair that sour mood. Of course, you can call up your pals to join you, but it is probably for the best to have some time for yourself. If your mood picks up, turn on some music and do a little jig for the fun of it!

Create Your Hate Club

Believe it or not, gossiping does help in busting stress. If you have had enough of your surly boss and his spiteful remarks, then here is a fun way to vent that frustration. Create a hate club! Chances are that your colleague might be going through the same hard time as you are. You have a partner to grumble to; what are you waiting for? Crib, discuss and cook up plans to tackle the issue. All this is sure to put you in a good mood and make life easier!

A Good Night's Sleep

Your cranky mood can be down to sleep-deprivation. All work and no sleep will turn you into a zombie. Only way you can ease your frayed nerves is by having a good night's sleep. Before you hit the sack, make sure you rid yourself of the day's baggage. If you have trouble sleeping, try listening to light music, reading or drinking warm milk. It can put you to ease and help you sleep better. When fully rested and well fed, you will notice the world has become a better place to live!

Sinful Indulgence

This is probably the best in the list. Another way to release happy hormones in your body is by chucking your diet plan and gorging into sinful delicacies. How about mouth-melting cupcakes with generous sprinkles of chocolate chips or better yet soft cake with liberal scoop of vanilla ice cream toppings, orgasmic food to pep up your mood? Gourmets of options are available to treat your taste buds; take your pick!

Cuddle Up With Your Pet

If you have a pet in your life, you are bound to be the happiest person on planet earth. A pet can do what an expensive diamond ring or a snazzy hot wheel cannot, which is bringing a million watt genuine smile on your face. Cuddle up your pet, give them a bath, take a walk or play with them, let their warmth seep into you. It is the best feeling in the world!

If you feel the similar old, sad feelings sneaking up on you, take stock of your life and count all the blessings. It will immediately make you feel better.

A great way to release happy hormones in your body is by chucking your diet plan and gorging into sinful delicacies. How about mouth-melting cupcakes with generous sprinkles of chocolate chips? For delicious kids cakes in Perth, click on this link.

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